Eventually in a relationship living together becomes the obvious next step. When you think about this, you end up quite excited by the ideal expectations you have created throughout time. One never thinks about living together as a threat to a relationship but a win. What if living together was the ultimate test? Not only it tests the relationships itself but it can end up making you see your partner less?
Is living together harder than you think?
If you want to step up your game, then you must acknowledge that things will get harder. Just like video games, when you pass on to the next level they will make it harder for you to pass on to the next. Relationships itself are a paradox, they will make you the happiest you have ever been to but will also make you fight the hardest. First of all, when you chose to move in with a person your whole life will change. From now on all your decisions will have to be made for two and after this, you will only be separated if you end things. The responsibilities double and independence becomes a bit more dependent. Sounds scarier with this point of view but this is not the scary part.
You go from in love to comfortable roommates
To explain this better, I will make up a scenario. So you have dated your girlfriend for two years so you both decide it is time to move in together. At first, it is a pink bubble of smiles and unrealistic time together. Then you both enter the routine of life. One of you always ends up having to do more chores, she is very untidy so you always need to organize her things and although you live together you both see each other way less than when you were dating. Moments together are always spent eating, sleeping or watching something. There are no dates, no adventures, no surprises and you both just become a routine. Checking everything on your to-do list and forgetting the person in front of you. Time goes by, life happens, you both grow and one day you wake up not even knowing who the person sleeping by your side actually is.
What to avoid to never enter a rut
Always remember to keep things fresh for your partner. When you start dating someone you take your time to look good, to select small things to make them smile and you are always eager to see them again. Although if you can see that person every day you end up forgetting to cherish them. You can never let the comfort of a routine make you ignore romance. Even if you have to create a date a month in the calendar. Something that seems quite small but has a big effect is to never forget to ask how your partners day was. The fact that you care and listen makes the other feel heard. That keeps the heart warm. Ironically sometimes it is important to have some time for yourself because in the chaos of a relationship you may get sucked into a non-centered relationship.
Always remember
The person you chose to live with loves you. The step to move in together is huge and if you work on the relationship something amazing will come out of it. It may be a hard step but for those who actually care it ends up being more than the blissful expectations of the start.
